Tuesday, May 8, 2012
The things you will do for your daughters
Today, I played beauty shop. I'm a 6'7" guy with no hair. Just how much time do you think I have ever spent in a beauty salon? In fact, most of what I know about running a beauty salon has been from Queen Latifah's 2005 movie called Beauty Shop, Don't Mess With the Zohan, and Tabitha Takes Over. Being a guy who is follically challenged I just haven't spent the required time to REALLY know what goes on in there. But when it comes to my daughters I will play just about anything to make them happy. As a guy growing up with three brothers we were all about He-Man, G.I. Joe, and WWF wrestling. I loved pretending to kick people's asses and blowing them up with ridiculously looking weapons. I know that Battle Ready My Little Pony doesn't exist, although it should because my daughter has yet to hear my uncanny impression of a helicopter providing air support. Playing with your little girls is going to be all about the experience. Where are they going, what are they wearing, who are they going with? The endless scenarios that my four year old comes up with astonishes me because our version of getting dressed up to go someplace fancy has always been church. When you have kids you aren't going out for fancy dinners with the kids. If you are, then you are leaving them behind with a babysitter in their PJs to eat chicken nuggets and eat an ice cream sandwich for dessert if they are good. Despite my doubts of playing beauty shop, I think I pulled it off. I actually wore a wig from my choice Shaggy costume; the friend of Scooby Doo not the rasta rapper. We primped and talked about her day. We took turns "washing" each other's "hair". She asked me how much I wanted cut and I said two inches. She yelled and looked aghast. "Two inches!? That's way too much!" she said. 1 inch, 2 inches, whatever it takes was my reply. She blow dried my hair and even put in some conditioner. One she called "Bread" and the other "Ginger" so I went with my favorite island castaway. It sounded more posh than Bread even though bread DOES smell good I was afraid that any outside birds might attack me while going to the mailbox later. What I learned is that playing My Little Pony is exhausting and it makes me sleepy. Maybe it is because I am laying on the floor while playing and the Ginger was making me sleepy or maybe it is because of the endless talking and not enough butt kicking. However, despite these hurdles I will face in the future at least I know that 2 inches in too much and that I am lucky to have had this time with my girls.